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Valentine's day without your love is like a year without the Internet.

Quoted by Santosh Kalwar

Philadelphia is just the tip of the Pittsburgh.

Quoted by The Covert Comic

He's got the kind of body that could turn a nun into a whore.

Quoted by Brooke Moss

The grass is always greener when it's covered in money.

Quoted by Craig Benzine

Life before toilet paper was not worth living.

Quoted by Sherrilyn Kenyon

Yo Mama's so fat her butt cheeks have different area codes.

Quoted by Oliver Oliver Reed

Yo Mama's so fat, her ass has its own congressman!

Quoted by Oliver Oliver Reed

If Yo Mama and Yo Daddy got a divorce, they'd still be brother and sister.

Quoted by Oliver Oliver Reed

Yo Mama's so old, her memory is in black and white.

Quoted by Oliver Oliver Reed

When Chuck Norris calls 911 it's to ask if everything is ok.

Quoted by Oliver Oliver Reed

I wish you all the best in life. Hell, I will even write your obituary for free.

Quoted by Fakeer Ishavardas

I'm fascinated by idiots... Here's looking at you, kid!

Quoted by Fakeer Ishavardas

I want to be the reason you look down at your phone and smile. And then walk into a pole.

Quoted by Ami RiechmanBennett

I have great respect for you - once you are dead, and gone

Quoted by Fakeer Ishavardas

Monkeying around with other apes, a monkey was made - called, HUMAN. God is great!

Quoted by Fakeer Ishavardas

Whenever I wish to pay my respect to you, my middle finger says, it must first.

Quoted by Fakeer Ishavardas

Dead people are just great. Meet me when you are.

Quoted by Fakeer Ishavardas

Wise men don't feel companionless when they are not in the company of their egos.

Quoted by Delian Zahariev

I am not trying to be funny, it is just that you're a joke.

Quoted by Fakeer Ishavardas

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